I GOT IN A RELATIONSHIP FOR ALL THE WRONG REASONS...
and when my ex didn't turn out to be everything I imagine he'd be,
I just wanted to end everything.
THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS THE PERFECT SOUL MATE.
If you meet someone and you think they're perfect,
you better run as fast as you could in the other direction...
CAUSE YOU'RE SOUL MATE IS THE VERSION THAT PUSHES ALL YOUR BUTTONS,
PISSES YOU OFF ON A REGULAR BASIS AND MAKES YOU FACE YOUR SHIT.
IT'S NOT EASY HAVING A GOOD MARRIAGE/RELATIONSHIP.
BUT I DON'T WANT EASY...
EASY DOESN'T MAKE YOU GROW...
EASY DOESN'T MAKE YOU THINK...
I have thanked God everyday that I was in a relationship with a person who makes me think...
THAT'S MY DEFINITION OF TRUE LOVE...
BUT SAD TO SAY...
My partner fell thru the self made traps...
Now, the true love that I have considered is shattered...
WHY? Because this person refuses to think!
Shallow in a self world... With absolutely no direction in life...
MY PARTNER WANTS EVERYTHING TO BE EASY...SMOOTH SAILING... AND HAPPY!
DEFINITELY A COWARD, AND CAN'T FACE THE REALITY THAT EVERY RELATIONSHIPS HAS ITS UPS AND DOWNS AND PROBLEMS.
IT TAKES TIME FOR ADJUSTMENTS...
My partner couldn't accept that... and wanted to change me physically and mentally...
After the breakup, I thought I was lost forever, cause something that felt right wasn't even right...
I STILL BELIEVE IN ROMANCE... I STILL BELIEVE IN LOVE...
NO MATTER WHAT YOU DID...
NO MATTER WHO ARE...
NO MATTER WHERE YOU'VE COME FROM...
YOU CAN ALWAYS CHANGE...
BECOME BETTER VERSIONS OF YOURSELF...
I KNOW THAT I HAVE A HUGE EGO and I need to do something about it... I need to CHANGE!
And how do I change? THE ONLY WAY I COULD CHANGE IS CONSTANTLY TO WORK AT IT.
KNOWING IS THE BEGINNING...
KNOWING MORE, LEARNING MORE, AND ACHIEVING MORE...
THE MINUTE YOU STOP TO KNOW MORE,
THAT'S WHEN YOU STOP GROWING, AND THAT'S WHEN YOU DIE...
THAT'S WHEN YOU'RE NOTHING...
Even if this person won't admit having faults... I admit I have my share of faults and have apologized for them sincerely already... I have already forgiven this person... Right now, I'm just living by the saying in the torah that says : "IN ALL MY DAYS, I FORGAVE AND MADE PEACE WITH ANY MAN WHO DID EVIL BY ME, THUS I DID NOT HARBOR ANY HATRED ALL THAT DAY FOR THE HARM HE DID ME. MOREOVER, FROM THAT DAY ON, I TRIED TO DO KINDNESS BY THEM."
It is the hardest thing in the world to do, can you imagine forgiving people that you know, fuck you over, for the lack of a better word. I mean to actually to get to the end of the day and the coming days okay, but to get thru it and not only forgive those who hurt you and leave you scar wounds, but to wish them well... That is tough!
POWER IS BEING TOLD YOU ARE NOT LOVED AND NOT BE DESTROYED BY IT!
I NOW FEEL MORE AT PEACE FOR I'VE SAID MY PIECE...
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